| SEPTEMBER STAR CRAZY
By
Danielle Dowling
VIRGO When you’ve finished fretting over
the list that meticulously details the faults you’d like to purge from your personality in the coming year, get out and party for Chrissakes. It’s high time you surrounded yourself with friends and well-wishers and whooped it up. In fact, anything that involves large groups of people—whether they love, hate, or don’t know you—is likely to be positive, so your catchphrase, should you choose to accept it, is “The more, the merrier.”
STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT: September 20, 21, 22
STICK TO THE SHADOWS: September 7, 8
IF YOU WERE AN ICE CREAM FLAVOR, YOU’D BE: Cherry Garcia
LIBRA Sit yourself in front of a magnifying mirror and pore over your pores, then stand before a triptych mirror and examine your many curves, bulges, and assorted anomalies. A masochistic recipe for certain depression? Not exactly. Right now you have the power to study your flaws while keeping your attributes top of mind (so long as you don’t start obsessing and prolong your evaluation for several hours). Once you’re done, you can craft a makeover plan, get cracking, and emerge brand-new just in time for your birthday.
STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT: September 23, 24
STICK TO THE SHADOWS: September 9, 10
IF YOU WERE AN ICE CREAM FLAVOR, YOU’D BE: Mint chocolate chip
SCORPIO How much is that crazy-cool bling-bling in the window? Before you lay down the beaucoup ducats, you may want to sleep on the decision to buy that gold-plated, diamond-crusted manhole cover with the superfly rope chain. Sure, everyone who’s anyone has got one, but is it you? Maybe the money would be better spent on dinner with a friend whose bridge you burned. You have the E.T. touch right now, so let the healing begin.
STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT: September 25, 26, 27
STICK TO THE SHADOWS: September 11, 12
IF YOU WERE AN ICE CREAM FLAVOR, YOU’D BE: Nutty Coconut
SAGITTARIUS If you don’t know yourself by now, you’d better learn quick or get ready with the hose to put out the many raging infernos breaking out all over the matrix that was once your life. Afterward, your world may resemble 1871 Chicago, but buck up, Li’l Smokie: You can make like Jamie Sommers, the Bionic Woman, and rebuild yourself. You have the technology. You can become deeper, stronger, faster, and chicer to boot. And just in time to meet your perfect love.
STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT: September 1, 2, 29
STICK TO THE SHADOWS: September 13, 14
IF YOU WERE AN ICE CREAM FLAVOR, YOU’D BE: Neapolitan Dynamite
CAPRICORN It ain’t winter just yet, so why go into hibernation mode? Get out there and mix it up. Have one last fling before the chill in the air sends you fleeing toward your cave. At least get your puss to the cosmetics counter and try out a new eye palette for fall. And if you've always dreamed of snagging a job that could fund your fondness for Jimmy Choos, seize the day: Make the plans and take the courses that’ll get you there.
STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT: September 3, 4, 30
STICK TO THE SHADOWS: September 15, 16, 17
IF YOU WERE AN ICE CREAM FLAVOR, YOU’D BE: Cookies and cream
AQUARIUS Once in a blue moon, your intuition holds hands and frolics with your intellect, granting you the power to transform your grandest fantasies into unbelievable realities, and for you, that time is now. Heightening this interlude is a sudden, uncanny ability to read people’s minds. You’ll know just what to say to captivate those whose ears you have with your fanciful visions. But push it too far and they’ll turn on you faster than your well-heeled heels can carry you.
STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT: September 5, 6
STICK TO THE SHADOWS: September 18, 19
IF YOU WERE AN ICE CREAM FLAVOR, YOU’D BE: Mango sherbet
PISCES Tempted by the fruit of another? You may well be if you’ve been hiding your true self away from the one you really love. Bottling up your feelings to spare someone else’s will only serve to hurt both parties, so find the best way to express what’s on your mind. Besides, think of how all that pent-up tension could amount to a big, fat zit on your chin. (By the way, if you’re looking for a novel outlet for your frustrations, steer clear of any extreme sports.)
STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT: September 7, 8
STICK TO THE SHADOWS: September 21, 22
IF YOU WERE AN ICE CREAM FLAVOR, YOU’D BE: Rocky Road
ARIES You know that friend of yours who's fun to hang with most of the time but has this annoying habit of jawing on and on about nothing in particular? Evade her this month, because she'll rattle your nerves more than usual. Actually, many of the people closest to you will probably get under your skin. But if you can channel that tension creatively, you'll be able to clear the air with more than a few of them, and you'll all live happily ever after. Use your newfound obsession with healthiness to revive your workout routine—that way you can burn off the mountains of moon pies you've been gorging on.
STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT: September 9, 10
STICK TO THE SHADOWS: September 23, 24
IF YOU WERE AN ICE CREAM FLAVOR, YOU’D BE: Low-fat gelato
TAURUS Need to replenish your fall and winter looks? Grab your wallet and hit the mall, sister. Right now you've got Carson Kressley's eyes when it comes to picking out the coordinates and accessories that will tie your entire wardrobe together in a neat little bow. And all that shopping will come in handy: If you're single, you're likely to attract the attention of a new love interest, and how better to dazzle that person than with a slammin' new outfit?
STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT: September 11, 12
STICK TO THE SHADOWS: September 26, 27
IF YOU WERE AN ICE CREAM FLAVOR, YOU’D BE: Very Berry Strawberry
GEMINI Home is where your heart is. The only catch is that either your place resembles Times Square a few hours after the ball dropped or the people you live with are doing their best impersonations of Oscar the Grouch. Like you really want to deal with that. You just want to put on your fuzzy slippers and chill. But no worries—things should improve as the month marches on. In the meantime, buy a new rug. Not only will it cover the clutter; it might just cheer up you and the crew, as long as you don’t break the bank on it.
STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT: September 13, 14
STICK TO THE SHADOWS: September 1, 28, 29
IF YOU WERE AN ICE CREAM FLAVOR, YOU’D BE: Chocolate chip cookie dough
CANCER You don't want to work; you just want to bike around the park all day. Well, if you can give the office the slip for a few hours, go for it, but sally forth knowing that your BlackBerry is sure to pop the balloon of your afternoon delight at some point. Maybe you could soothe your end-of-the-summer jitters by taking up a new hobby—like the Japanese art of bonsai perhaps. And if your roommate happens to comment on your lack of tree-trimming skills, you shouldn't hesitate in telling her where she can stick it; just don't shear off her head.
STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT: September 15, 16, 17
STICK TO THE SHADOWS: September 3, 4, 30
IF YOU WERE AN ICE CREAM FLAVOR, YOU’D BE: Vermonty Python
LEO A flurry of social activity is likely to last long past Labor Day, with fresh faces to meet and unseen places to visit topping the to-do list. In your travels, you may come across someone new, who might sweep you off your feet in a forever sort of way if you're able to quell the OCD before you start nest-building. You may also come across something old—an original Diana Von Furstenberg wrap dress in pristine condition or a dazzling ring in a vintage Art Deco setting—that'll knock your jaw to the floor. If you have the cash to spare, make the investment; you'll probably be able to buy a small island with the proceeds from it a few years down the road.
STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT: September 18, 19
STICK TO THE SHADOWS: September 5, 6
IF YOU WERE AN ICE CREAM FLAVOR, YOU’D BE: French vanilla | 
|
Birthday Girl: Beyoncé Knowles (September 4)
Empire builder—that’s your game. You’d rather pave your career path slowly than rise to the top in a giddy whirlwind. Waste of any kind makes you twitch. Everything you do is accomplished with the utmost efficiency, and you make damn sure that your fans get their money’s worth. Just remember to take a breather every now and then, because you have a tendency to work yourself into the ground. Your kingdom won’t crumble if you leave it alone for a week or so.
|
|